Title: 晨思 (Morning Meditation)
With my eyes tightly shut, I shouldn’t see anything at all—yet somehow, it feels like I can see everything.
It’s as if everything is vividly before me! In the dream, I can barely tell if I'm inside it or observing it from outside...
When my mother starts talking, she rarely stops; that’s just her way. She’s uncomfortable with silence when people gather.
At this moment, I wasn’t even listening to what she was saying.
Her voice was soft, but I could see her excitement as she chatted with a group of strangers, who seemed captivated by her stories and earnest gestures.
Nearby, some young women who looked like college students seemed annoyed by her talkativeness. One of them, visibly displeased, turned to my mother and said, “Ma’am, could you lower your voice in public?"
Oh, was she bothering them? I decided to step in and handle the awkward situation.
At that moment, I, too, was distracted by a background noise—a noise that had been there since I’d first closed my eyes.
The irritating sound was like that of a stormy night, with the wind rattling against the large windows.
I opened my eyes and looked at the young woman who had spoken to my mother. Beside her were two or three others, like a close-knit group of friends, quietly backing her with their expressions and gestures.
I walked over and said politely, “Sorry about that! That’s my mom. She’s quite old and just loves to chat—she means no harm.” Then I leaned in and whispered in English, “She’s so old; she’s in the final stage of her life now."
I hoped they’d understand. I wanted them to sympathize or empathize with her, not to hold a grudge against an elderly woman for being a bit loud.
Sure enough, the young women quickly softened. They seemed to assume my mother had some incurable illness, and their eyes filled with a mix of confusion and pity, unsure how to respond.
Seizing the moment, I added, “Believe it or not, I’m already seventy—seventy-one in traditional age!
The awkwardness melted away, and I woke up from my dream.
It was all just a dream! As I awoke, I realized that the storm continued to howl outside the bedroom window. Typhoon Kong-rei was passing by, and according to last night’s weather forecast, it should have already moved out to sea. So, what’s going on? Is Taiwan still within the storm’s grasp?
My phone displayed [2:36]. It was just past two-thirty in the morning, and the noise had woken me up.
For a moment, I thought of my parents, both of whom have passed away. My mother left in 2020, and my father in 2015.
Though the bedroom light was off, the dim hallway light outside filtered in through the glass panel above the door, casting a soft yellow glow on the slippers at the foot of the bed.
I could also see my “sleeping partner” on the other side of the joined bed.
She’s told me several times that, if she wakes up at night and sees me beside her, sleeping peacefully, she feels a deep sense of reassurance.
“But, if there ever comes a day…” she often adds, “when I wake up and don’t see you there, I really wouldn’t know what to do…"
Thank God! We’re still here, together, sharing our lives.
Beyond being each other’s confidants, we also keep close family in our thoughts, those we care about most. Our “inner circle” includes her elderly mother (my mother-in-law), our son, daughter-in-law, and grandchildren. Of course, the bonds with our own brothers and sisters are also significant.
As for friends, I don’t have many—and to explain a bit humorously, I’m not into politics, I’m not in business, and I don’t invest much in social networking. So, I don’t cultivate many friendships and avoid superficial ones.
Though few in number, any “good friends” or “close friends” I have are genuine, kind-hearted, and wise companions.
Beyond these cherished friends, I’ve also benefited from mentors who were not only skilled but also of great character. Their names are imprinted in my heart, never to be erased!
My family itself is large—dozens, almost a hundred members when including each “branch” with children, grandchildren, and in-laws. Staying in touch, learning from each other, and offering mutual blessings strengthens our bonds. What greater joy could there be? Loneliness is out of the question.
So many dear family members and friends come to mind—those who have passed and those still with us, near or far—all deserving of our quiet prayers.
